Goals

My running and fitness goals have changed so much over the past almost two years. I have gone back and forth in my head about whether or not I "care" if I get faster or not. I am currently applying to run for a charity in Boston 2015, but I'm scared about the fundraising minimum amount and not sure if I'd be successful at that. After talking to a runner friend on the phone tonight, I was reminded of how much I'd save financially if I didn't have to chance paying the difference of the amount I raise and the minimum I'm supposed to raise. A lot. So... back to the mindset of wanting to get faster.

Things that I worry about in trying to get faster:

• what if I can't? what if I just suck and can't get faster?
• what if I get injured by trying to change too much too quickly?
• what if I do improve a lot and still never qualify for Boston? 
• what if I don't know what to do to get faster? 
• what if I start to hate running because of the difficulty in getting faster?

I realize these are all silly questions (that or legit concerns), and need to just embrace the fact that it could work or I could have bad luck and it doesn't work. Either way I need to try. I bought a book to read on kindle about getting faster; Matt Fitzgerald is one of the authors, so hopefully it's good. 

I also realize that in order to get faster, I need to lose some weight. Someone already pointed out on Facebook that I need to be the correct "fitness level and body composition" in order to take a large amount of time off my PR. Is it going to be difficult to do more if I'm hungry from losing weight? 

So many questions...